It seems disadvantageous for me to write about this topic. People think of me as someone who got into a UC and flew through the four years without any issues. To write this post, I have to be willing to taint that. Now, that thought process is ridiculous. Hardships happen in everyone's life and shouldn't taint one's accomplishments. However, we have built a culture where setbacks are seen as failures. To fix this, it is important that we, as a society, talk about the different issues that arise during one’s educational career. (*Note: To keep this post short, I will only talk about the biggest setback I faced in college, but I faced many setbacks, big and small, along the way.)
Storytime… The week before finals during my first quarter of college, I was doing extremely poorly in my courses. When I talked to my academic advisor, she suggested I withdraw from all my classes. I was shocked. I came back to the dorms and cried for hours. My parents were extremely disappointed. It felt like the end of my educational career, like I plummeted into a deep well that I wouldn't be able to get out of. After careful thought, I decided to go ahead and withdraw from all my classes. Within a second, I lost all the hard work I put in, and my parents lost the thousands they invested. My college plan was shattered.
Everyone has a dream of how they want their life to be, and things don't always go according to plan. However, when they hit a small bump in the road, people start to doubt their capabilities. But, why should they? They should remember that it is normal and even necessary to take a small detour.
This isn't a new, profound thought. So why don't students actually, truly believe it? Why did I feel like I had failed when I "know" that hardships and setbacks are part of the process? The answer is simple; students who succeed don't talk about the hardships and struggles they had to face to get there. College graduates won't talk about the real setbacks, instead, they will impress you with how they got a difficult degree while juggling clubs, a job/internship, and courses. This makes future students assume that they should be able to easily handle everything from the get-go and that their path must be silky smooth.
These flawed expectations extend to parents as well. It is impressive to hear about the silky smooth road to success but to hear about the obstacles behind that success is grounding. These stories will give future students confidence and strength to keep going even when something unexpected happens. Students need to realize that as long as they are doing their absolute best, they will be able to bounce back from any setback they face, big or small, even if it puts them a whole quarter behind.
When faced with my own big setback(s), I realized I needed to make some changes. I created a new 3 and 3/4 year plan, looked for things I could improve on and developed new study habits. I bounced back, graduated in four years, found a job soon after and have now started a blog in my free time, but I am still not exempt from setbacks.
But please, don't think I'm giving you a green light to fail your first quarter.
Storytime… The week before finals during my first quarter of college, I was doing extremely poorly in my courses. When I talked to my academic advisor, she suggested I withdraw from all my classes. I was shocked. I came back to the dorms and cried for hours. My parents were extremely disappointed. It felt like the end of my educational career, like I plummeted into a deep well that I wouldn't be able to get out of. After careful thought, I decided to go ahead and withdraw from all my classes. Within a second, I lost all the hard work I put in, and my parents lost the thousands they invested. My college plan was shattered.
Everyone has a dream of how they want their life to be, and things don't always go according to plan. However, when they hit a small bump in the road, people start to doubt their capabilities. But, why should they? They should remember that it is normal and even necessary to take a small detour.
This isn't a new, profound thought. So why don't students actually, truly believe it? Why did I feel like I had failed when I "know" that hardships and setbacks are part of the process? The answer is simple; students who succeed don't talk about the hardships and struggles they had to face to get there. College graduates won't talk about the real setbacks, instead, they will impress you with how they got a difficult degree while juggling clubs, a job/internship, and courses. This makes future students assume that they should be able to easily handle everything from the get-go and that their path must be silky smooth.
These flawed expectations extend to parents as well. It is impressive to hear about the silky smooth road to success but to hear about the obstacles behind that success is grounding. These stories will give future students confidence and strength to keep going even when something unexpected happens. Students need to realize that as long as they are doing their absolute best, they will be able to bounce back from any setback they face, big or small, even if it puts them a whole quarter behind.
When faced with my own big setback(s), I realized I needed to make some changes. I created a new 3 and 3/4 year plan, looked for things I could improve on and developed new study habits. I bounced back, graduated in four years, found a job soon after and have now started a blog in my free time, but I am still not exempt from setbacks.
But please, don't think I'm giving you a green light to fail your first quarter.
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